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For most men, it seems the topic of women bringing up sex too soon appears to be a non-issue. After months of inquiries, I was unable to locate even a single guy who found it a problem. But for women, the issue is Big and Troublesome and Creepy. E-ping Toms. Sex Scavengers. Internet Degenerates. From unseemly photos to body part inquiries to the wolf-in-Prince Charming's-clothing, female online daters are bombarded with inappropriate IMs, photos and emails. An online dater from Baltimore sums it up: "I normally would disregard those emails and write those prospects off. Imagine what a first date would be like if they were already lecherous just on e-mail!" To most women, sex talk too early on is the online dating equivalent of Internet pharmacy spam clogging up your inbox. It's annoying, unwelcome, and we can't imagine that anyone would actually respond. Many women feel that a guy who brings up bedroom talk right away is just looking for sex, or maybe worse, "they have no manners." Most experts agree that when someone brings up sex right away, it should raise some red flags. Psychotherapist Wendy Allen says, "A man wanting sex too early has nothing to do with you. It's just their own persistent horniness." She adds, "This transparency has given you a window into this person's motives. Move on to the next one!" Toni Coleman, a relationship coach and psychotherapist agrees. "It can also be a complete turn-off to many women (and some men). When someone does this, it can indicate that they are only interested in sex, have poor boundaries and/or impulse control, or are a potential stalker, to name a few."
relationship coach and psychotherapist
Mary Jo Fay, author of Please Dear, Not Tonight: The Truth About Women and Sex says, "Men who wave the sexual flag early are letting women know what their priority is... and for the women who ignore that flag and then begin to wonder later just exactly what went wrong and why her new Mr. Right is really Mr. Wrong... well, they only have themselves to blame."

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